It has been a while since I have written, but this has just been something really prominent in my life that I feel like I should share.
Lately, I have been feeling so discouraged in almost every area of life and it is so draining emotionally and spiritually.
These discouraging feelings come in so many different forms, but the two it boils down to are when it comes to my intelligence and my passions. Don’t get me wrong, I know I’m not stupid and that my passions are real things I can strive for, but it is hard to do these things when it feels like the world and the people that are supposed to support you don’t.
These are two areas that I have struggled with primarily this semester because people just don’t get it. They don’t understand why I switched from nursing to christian studies so they assume it’s because I didn’t understand the content or that I was just to lazy and stupid to follow through with it. They look at me like I’m crazy when I say that I want to work overseas where it is dangerous for women to be. I get judged so hard when I say that I don’t want to have my own children and that I want to adopt children. I get judged when I say that I am a christian studies major and get told good luck with that.
Yes, these things don’t really make sense to some people, but shouldn’t we be here to support one another and build each other up?
What people don’t realize when they make comments like that is that it is making an attack towards the person I want to be and who I feel I have been called to be.
Tonight in a small group we were going over James 3 and how powerful ones tongue is and it is SO TRUE. The tongue is the only body part that satan has control over because he can creep into your thoughts and you typically speak what you think. Realizing this is so important because you can’t allow others words to get a hold of you. When we allow that to happen, we are giving power to the enemy.
So realizing this, I have decided that when people make negative or snarky comments to me the only thing I can do is know it is the enemy speaking through them and it is not who I truly am.
Recognizing and living out who God called us to be is the only thing we can do when it feels like no one else believes in us.